CCXI - ever everland

Where have I gone? I find myself circling around and back to this a little lately. Where is that almost mystical, slightly deranged, quixotic questing, the bizarre zealotry, the fanatic puristic, single minded, insatiable self delusion for believing in what must surely be, while fending off the twin wolves of futility and dreadful purposelessness, alienation, no direction home, where has all that youthful madness gone? I don't know. I've lost it. I can barely get out of the house lately. Where's the old yearning, the wistfulness, the embracing of loneliness and fierce despair? I don't know. The lunacy, the silliness, the pride in being alone, grinning at the madness, the sadness, it's all gone. It's given up the ghost. I'm so boring. If I've given up all that old stuff, then I must have decided somewhere along the way: I guess I'd rather be boring. I guess I'd rather be ... Meter Man, than Peter Pan. Meter Man and the soft boys of ever everland. None of us a shadow. I'm sorry, Wendy Darling, Peter's taken his briefcase and gone off to work. 3rd street to the right, and straight on till evening. Best shut the window on the way out. You won't recognise him at first, but a little flicker in the browns of his eyes and I think you'll know it. A dim sort of grasping, and then nothing. A Mister Man, again.